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America vs. The World

The big trouble with dumb bastards is that they are too dumb to believe there is such a thing as being smart. — Kurt Vonnegut, Jr.

Friday, February 09, 2007

Respect for the dead

Whatever you think about Anna Nicole Smith this much is unarguably true:

Anna Nicole Smith went before the U.S. Supreme Court and won. Unanimously.

In life Anna Nicole Smith had a ridiculous persona. Her breasts were enormous. She spoke in a ditzy voice. She made silly decisions. She wore wonderfully giant sunglasses. She might have married for reasons other than love. She did not marry foolishly.

She had two children. One of them died days after the other was born.

Anna Nicole Smith lived a real life, not just like everyone else — but not so unlike everyone else, either. And Anna Nicole Smith deserves respect. Not this:
HOLLYWOOD, Fla. (AP) — Anna Nicole Smith, the pneumatic blonde whose life played out as an extraordinary tabloid tale — Playboy centerfold, jeans model, bride of an octogenarian oil tycoon, reality-show subject, tragic mother — died Thursday after collapsing at a hotel. She was 39.
If you don't know what I'm upset about direct your attention to the descriptor "pneumatic." (I also don't like "bride of an octogenarian" or "tragic mother" either.)

Pneumatic isn't a word you use to describe a person. Correction: It's not a word you use to describe a person worthy of respect, at least according to the AP.

I earned a journalism degree. I know how to write an obituary. Heck, I wrote my own for an assignment.

You write an obit with respect. Anna Nicole Smith deserves respect — no matter how busty or silly or ditzy she was. If she got respect from the U.S. Supreme Court, it shouldn't be so hard for the AP to show a bit.
Jeff Goldstein is a wanker.